I wasn’t going to do another post on this subject, because I seriously thought that it might be too much dealing with one particular thing or subject.

Instead what I realized by the original post, and the comments and emails I have been getting ever since, is that it is a problem that a lot of families face, and it might be helpful to delve into it a bit more.

First, you need to review your situation. You need to look at it from all angles, and be sure that there really is a problem. What I mean is, are you sure that there are children who aren’t getting as much as others? Are you looking at all sides of this? For instance, it might seem as if some of the kids are getting all these gifts from extended family members, but don’t the other kids have extended family members that also might spoil the children?

Are there times when certain children are at home with you, while others are away, and that might be spoiled a little in other ways?

For instance, I tend to do more with my children when the step-kids are visiting their mom every other weekend. We go out for ice cream, sometimes to dinner, we might take in a movie or visit the zoo or something else. While it might not see like a gift, it is special time with my children and the other kids are not involved at that point because they are off with their own mother.

Or does it seem like maybe you cannot do these things with your children, and maybe it is when the step-kids are away - they are the ones being spoiled. Sometimes this cannot be controlled and building a healthy relationship with your own children should be foremost in your mind.

You might be surprised to learn that even just sitting down and reading or doing crafts with your kids will make them happier than getting gifts.
Take a walk, play a game, watch a movie snuggled together (yes even with older kids), etc. You need to teach your children that gifts are not everything, the gift of time and love is far more important than any old monetary thing. Now, with all of that said, it is still difficult for younger children to appreciate that. So I will delve further into that in a future article.

Have a happy day!

Not actually on purpose, but it seems I took a mini-vacation. It was the kids Spring Break and my kids are on year round school, so their Spring Break winds up lasting three whole weeks, although they lost the last week because of snow day make up. Talk about some not so happy kids. I will try and do a bit better about updating, especially realizing how many people out there count on my help.

Also, please understand that what works for us, is not necessarily going to be the saving grace for your family. My family is filled with lots of prayer and faith, which seriously helps. We have our problems just as any blended family or step family has, but we work on it together and it usually makes a big difference.

Blended families take LOADS of patience, and that is something I have found myself working on a lot!

I’ll be back regularly now!

Oh, and if you are in the least bit creative, or like crafty projects, feel free to check out my creative blog.

Brielle I can hardly believe that ten years have passed since they placed you in my arms. I cried, and cried. You were a gift, the answer to my prayers. I had my precious little boy and then, at that moment - I was complete. I had my beautiful baby girl. God has blessed me with you.

You were the first person I ever met that looked like me. That meant more than you could ever understand in your ten little years. But you have become one of my very favorite people in the world.

I have watched you grow and change over the years, and I think you are amazing. I think you have gifts that you yourself are still unaware of. I think you march to the beat of your very own drum, and I admire that. I also think that your dreams are slowly coming true each day that passes as you become more in tuned with the horses and your riding capabilities. You are amazing to watch. I hope that every dream you have will come true.

I love you today and always. You are my angel, my baby, my little girl. But most of all, you’ll always be my twinkie.

Happy 10th Birthday Sweetheart!

I am suddenly re-addicted to photo hunters and I am making a point to do it on all of my blogs. Simply because - it’s fun. And because each of my blogs has a theme which makes it easy to change the photographs to reflect my interests.

One of my favorite words in the world is FREE. Whether in means to get something for free (even though I will be the first to tell you that nothing in life is ever free), or just the simple word which means freedom. I am free. I am free to do what I want, I am free to make my own decisions, etc. I wanted to find a photograph that encompassed the word free. It was harder than I thought. (plus I was determined to find three - one for each blog.

Have you ever jumped on a swing before as an adult. It is so freeing. It feels great. Kids love swings because they feel invincible, free….. I love this pic of my youngest step daughter at the park one evening.

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Don’t just assume you have to be romantic today. Remember, the children in your life are just as loved as anyone else could be (probably more so). Don’t be depressed if it seems you have nobody to love today, because if you are here you must have children and trust me, they are worth celebrating on Valentines day!

I am warning you. Never offer to help four children create Valentine’s using your Cuttlebug and your stamps. Actually the stamps weren’t so bad. The cuttlebug - which I absolutely adore btw, was a nightmare. Do you know how many pieces of paper and how many little dies I had to shove through that thing to make these cards?

<—– 81 Valentine’s Day Cards

I didn’t want them to ruin the cuttlebug, and remember which plates went where, so I volunteered. One wanted a horse, one wanted a monkey, one wanted a frog and one wanted a pig. I’ll be honest, the monkey was the hardest. I wasn’t prepared for that. It is one of the cuddlekids dies and I had never used it. It is in TONS of pieces (separate ears, separate head, separate body, separate stomach, separate feet and then the shadow piece for the back) - ugh! The rest all had three.

Here is a close up of each kids cards, and while they look almost identical, they just liked the way they looked and wanted them that way (they absolutely love learning new techniques and how to make cards, etc…. they all loved how easy and perfect this one was.)

<—– Created by Brielle (24 of these)

<—— Created by Vanessa (13 of these)

<——– Created by Melissa (20 of these)
<——– Created by Jessica (24 of these)

They might be cute but they were ALOT of work! (probably should have just bought some!) hehehe

About a month ago I created a template for my other blogs. I fell in love with the ease of the template that I use on my other blogs (Musings of a Manic Mom) and (Scribbles ‘N Scraps) so I am using it here.

It allows for nice sized photos to be used, more room for actual posts and well - overall its a nice clean look. I created a new banner using the whole template and color scheme. Sorry that all my blogs kind of look alike, but I just love the look and the template design. What do you think?

I homeschool my oldest (and only) son but my four daughters attend public school. There are dozens of reasons, why we do it this way, but for me it was mostly academic and situational. On a message board I am on, a lady got the following letter from the school her child attends. I snipped only the important parts, because I want to paste my reply to her and also get others opinions on the whole thing.

As a school, we have been studying how to assess learning in a better way. We have been using some Thursday mornings to professionally develop ourselves on this topic. Furthermore, I recently attended a conference with 17 faculty members from TITLE OF SCHOOL entitled, “Sound Grading Practices”. We attended two days worth of workshops that helped us to see how we could vastly improve our current grading practices to help students be more motivated, become more confident as learners, and to achieve at higher levels. Among the sound grading practices we learned about include, but are not limited to:

Eliminating the use of zeros and 50’s for late work. Students should do ALL the work assigned, and a zero/50 does not allow a student to show what he or she really knows. The goal is to hold students responsible for the work until it is completed. Teachers may use an incomplete in place of a grade until the work is done. This will be done with limits and guidance, of course, but the overall goal is to create an accurate and clear picture of student achievement.

Offering descriptive feedback on ALL work intended for a grade. This allows students to correct and improve their work BEFORE they receive a grade. This is using formative assessments (generates information students can use to improve while learning is in progress) instead of using all summative assessments (measuring how much learning has taken place AFTER lessons and practices are complete—in other words, a final grade). Students still receive grades, of course—but AFTER they have had a chance to improve their work with descriptive feedback.

Removing behavior and other non-academic characteristics (effort, participation, attitude, etc…) from the grade a student receives. These are behaviors and not part of the intended learning for the course. The grade should accurately represent the learning tied to the courses students take, and these behaviors “cloud” what the true grade is. No more “fluff” grades, such as getting a 100 for bringing Kleenex or getting a letter signed—this causes grade inflation and distorts a true picture of achievement. Also, grades should not be used as a punishment. For example, if a student is caught cheating, he receives a consequence for the behavior of cheating, but not a zero—he should be held responsible for the cheating, but should be asked to complete the work anyway.

Allowing multiple chances for mastery. All students learn differently and need to be allowed the time and support to improve. Students should be allowed multiple chances to retest/rewrite/redo, with limits and guidance of course, until they demonstrate mastery of the intended learning.

Here is my reply back. I guess I just see more of a benefit than she does, because she seemed upset by it. The replies she received seemed more positive than negative so that’s good, but still….. I am not sure that I can see how this would be bad for anyone at all.

I am sure this is so not what you are intending to hear, but I think this is one of the best ideas I have ever heard implemented into a school. I only wish our school would follow suit and before my children leave it.

Behavior should never be a part of a grade. Period. That does not at all show the academic knowledge that a child has obtained. Whether in elementary or high school. Period. In elementary school the two grades are separate. The letter grade reflects the knowledge the student demonstrates. The behavior grade is a E - excellent, M - Meets expectations (sometimes an S which indicates Satisfactory) an I = Improvement Needed or a P = Poor. There is also a box located next to this on every report card or progress report sent home in which the teacher can define more clearly. Typically it is only used with an I or a P letter grade. Why could this not be used in upper grades?

Next, the zero/50 thing. I love that idea. A child misses an assignment, they get a 0%. They take a test, they get a 100%. Yet they fail the two combined. This seems totally unrealistic when looking at their academic growth. I do think a child should be accountable for a missed assignment. I think a child should be punished with an appropriate action for the offense, and I do not think that receiving a 0% is correct. This does not give a good grasp to the child’s learning. Instead it doesn’t show the child is learning anything when you look at the overall letter grade, which is what appears on the report cards and progress reports. There isn’t a breakdown, so if your child comes home with a D or F you think they need extra attention in the subject matter when this is not the case. Our middle school implements something called working lunches. If a child misses an assignment, the teacher places their name on a list and at the beginning of their lunch hour, their name is called for a working lunch. They are to sit at a specific table or tables and complete the assignment during lunch. I actually love this approach. I think it allows the child to complete the assignment to the best of their ability (showing their true academic knowledge of the subject material) while isolating them from their friends and their free time (the punishment).

I am a homeschooling mom of ONE, and a public school mom of four. Yes, I have one that is home with me being homeschooled. He is gifted and we are working on eighth grade material and he would be in 7th grade at school. I love the freedom and flexibility that this has allowed him. He can move at his own pace, I can work on certain material until I am certain of mastery (since like others have mentioned -children learn at different paces - period!) and we can move ahead to new subjects that he has moved beyond.

Now, with my four in public school, I have three in elementary - one of whom is gifted. I have one in middle school who is gifted and until this year (7th grade) was in the gifted program since 2nd or 3rd grade. She elected herself to drop it because she felt she wasn’t learning anything special nor was it helping her succeed academically anywhere else. (one of the reasons I chose to keep my son out). I see the homework that these children bring home. It is absolutely insane, and overall I have a bad taste for public schools. Ours is a blended family so three of these children are not mine by birth, and we have full custody of them. The other one is my daughter, and while I am contemplated pulling her out and homeschooling her (she is in 4th grade) I see no reason at this point. She gets straight A’s and is doing well. The only part she struggles with is the social aspect of school. Her behavior is wonderful but she tends to be a helper, takes on leadership roles with a vengeance and typically outsmarts most of her peers. The problem is, they pick on her because of this, while I, as the parent am extremely proud of her accomplishments and her skills.

I actually think implementing this type of system into the schools, would honestly show the true value of our children’s knowledge and not based on some strange percentage of behavior, attendance, homework and school work. All should have a place, but not as one single grade.

I am very sorry that you don’t like the new system they are trying to implement, but I would do almost anything to have that very system placed into any school my children attend. It might even make me less likely to homeschool my oldest, and allow him to return to public school. However, since I know its not happening, I will happily homeschool him and he will hopefully go on to do amazing things. His dream goal in life? To become a marine biologist. Do you know any other thirteen year olds with that goal? I’m so proud of him.

I hope you adjust to the new way things are. I hate change too, but I promise that everything I read sounds like a wonderful system and your child should thrive under that.

I was pleased this morning to sign on and see some of the original negatives who thought more about it return to positives and realize that this would really help a lot of kids. Now, I just wish the school were closer!